Humanities

Before we begin, you have our heartfelt sympathies for not receiving one of those beautiful invites for Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s wedding on 19 May 2018. But Kensington Palace has been doing us all a favour and announcing every wedding vendor and performer the couple has hired. Bless.

Therein lies the good news: you now have enough information to throw your own royal wedding of the year (without Harry and Meghan). Read on.

Location: St George’s Chapel
The wedding service will be held here, where Prince Harry was baptised in 1984. The chapel is expected to fit about 800 people, which makes it relatively more intimate than Prince William and Kate Middleton’s 1,000-plus guests at Westminster Abbey.

Prince Harry and Ms. Meghan Markle are hugely grateful for the many good wishes they have received since announcing their engagement. They are looking forward to the day and to being able to share their celebrations with the public and wanted to share the following details about their wedding on May 19th. They have today confirmed that their wedding will begin at 12noon, followed by a carriage procession at 1pm around Windsor Town, and reception at St George’s Hall. Later that evening, The Prince of Wales will give a private evening reception for the couple and their close friends and family. 📷PA

A post shared by Kensington Palace (@kensingtonroyal) on Feb 12, 2018 at 12:43am PST

Music at the service: Angels (kind of)
The music at William and Kate’s wedding was recorded and released digitally, so here’s hoping Harry and Meghan’s wedding gets the same treatment for the convenience of your DIY affair.

James Vivian, director of music at St George’s Chapel will direct all musical affairs during the wedding service. The ensemble includes the St George’s Chapel Choir; 19-year-old cellist Sheku Kanneh-Mason, who won BBC Young Musician 2016; gospel conductor Karen Gibson and The Kingdom Choir; Welsh soprano Elin Manahan Thomas; and an orchestra made up of musicians from BBC National Orchestra of Wales, the English Chamber Orchestra and the Philharmonia.

Needless to say, it’s going to be heavenly.

Music at the reception: TBC
Elton John, Ed Sheeran and the Spice Girls have been rumoured to be among the performers at the wedding reception – again, all rumours until we hear about it from the Palace. Which reception, we still don’t know. There’ll be two: one at St George’s Hall after the carriage procession around Windsor Town, and another in the evening, a private one given by the Prince of Wales at Frogmore House.

A grand carriage for the procession
After the wedding service, Harry and Meghan will step onto the Ascot Landau carriage, and be pulled by the Windsor Grey Horses through Windsor Town to greet the commonfolk. And mind you, these horses, while cute, are just magnificent. Two of them are actually father and son, Storm and Tyrone.

Meet Storm and Tyrone, father and son, two of the Windsor Grey Horses who will pull the Ascot Landau carriage on a procession through Windsor town after the wedding of Prince Harry and Ms. Markle! 🎥PA

A post shared by Kensington Palace (@kensingtonroyal) on May 2, 2018 at 3:34am PDT

Church flowers
Okay, here’s the upside: the flowers described by Kensington Palace sounds absolutely breathtaking. They will be arranged by Philippa Craddock.

“The displays in St George’s Chapel will feature foliage from The Crown Estate and Windsor Great Park, and will use seasonal plants including branches of beech, birch and hornbeam, as well as white garden roses, peonies and foxgloves,” the Palace announced. “The designs will reflect the wild and natural landscapes from which many of the plants will be drawn.”

The downside: they’re all local seasonal flowers… in England. It is reportedly the couple’s intention to keep decorations as sustainable as possible. So if you’re on this side of the pond, it may be a bit of a challenge to procure said florals without paying an arm and leg.

A post shared by Kensington Palace (@kensingtonroyal) on Apr 1, 2018 at 1:16am PDT

Cake: Violet
Pastry chef Claire Ptak, the owner of London-based bakery Violet, will create a lemon elderflower cake, covered with buttercream and decorated with fresh flowers. Simple in design, but rich in flavour – be sure to put this in your brief to your personal pastry chef.

A post shared by Kensington Palace (@kensingtonroyal) on Mar 20, 2018 at 3:35am PDT

Invitations: Barnard & Westwood
The invites by Barnard & Westwood were issued in the name of His Royal Highness The Prince of Wales, featuring his royal badge printed in gold ink. Consider only inviting those who would appreciate and keep such cards, because they are just exquisite (and expensive).

A post shared by Kensington Palace (@kensingtonroyal) on Mar 22, 2018 at 10:46am PDT

Security: Thames Valley Police
Well, obviously. Did you think they were just going to let people saunter into the wedding service at their whimsy? No. And neither would you, if you were throwing the wedding party of the century. The Thames Valley Police announced that among the security measures that will be taken at Harry and Meghan’s wedding include Automatic Number Plate Recognition (ANPR) technology, Closed Circuit Television (CCTV) and Hostile Vehicle Mitigation (HVM) barriers.

“There are also many security measures that you can’t see,” the police said.

It’s likely that the police force isn’t at your humble disposal, so you’ll just have to rely on your own eagle-eyed personnel (is that not what friends are for?).

This article will be updated.

Related: See First Photos of the Third Royal Baby